Jocelyn Aleksandra's Birth Story

Well, my next post was going to be about our camping trip and the excitement of my car blowing up on me, but it turns out that we have more exciting news to relate. As most everyone knows, Jocelyn Aleksandra blessed us by entering the world just a little bit early on August 1st. Her original due date was the 18th and, since Caitlyn was such a late baby, we weren't expecting her to arrive any time before then, so we weren't exactly prepared when I went in for my normal ob appointment only to find that they wanted to induce immediately. But, I'm getting ahead of myself...

To start with, when I came back from leave, I fully expected that I had gained a ton of weight since I was eating like a pig and not exercising at all; however, at my next ob appt, they told me I had only gained 2lb over the last month. The baby was also measuring a little small, but we weren't worried at that point. I figured maybe my due date was off by a week or two and Jocelyn would arrive late just like Caitlyn. Over the next couple of weeks, however, I not only lost the weight I had gained, but the baby began to measure even smaller. At Monday's appointment when I was approximately 38 weeks, Jocelyn was only measuring at 32 weeks. At that point, Dr Mills, my wonderful ob, decided to hook me up to the ultrasound machine and make sure everything was okay in there. She thought maybe it was just measuring small because the baby had lightened and was further down in the pelvic region. After doing the ultrasound, the baby was still measuring at only 32-34 weeks, approximately 3 1/2 - 4lb. Obviously this concerned her, so she decided to send me down to labor and delivery to get monitored for a while to see how the baby was doing in-utero.

At this point I was getting worried. Dr Mills told us that if the baby wasn't doing absolutely perfect, she would want to induce labor because she was concerned that it was thriving in the womb. Sha said, by keeping it inside we would actually be risking fetal death since it was't getting the oxygen it needed to keep growing. It was better to risk delivering the baby early (the biggest risk being that her lungs weren't fully developed and she would have to be hooked up to a ventilator) than leave it in. Although Jocelyn's heartrate wasn't bad, the technicians didn't see the activity they would have liked in order to continue the pregnancy. So, I was told that they were going to induce right then and there. To be honest, this pregnancy had been so healthy and uneventful that I never really believed that anything was going to come of all the tests they were doing. I honestly thought I'd just be headed home and monitored a little more frequently for the remainder of the pregnancy. So, needless to say, it was a real shock when they told me they were just going to keep me there and induce labor. I wasn't ready! We had barely gotten a car seat just the day before, and I didn't even have a hospital bag ready. Not to mention both my babysitter (our friends Joe and Gwen) and my back-up (my friend Donna) were both out of town for various reasons, so we had no idea what to do with Caitlyn (who, having no idea about the risk, was just thrilled that the baby was finally coming). Luckily, we were able to get a hold of her old babysitter who agreed to take her for the night.

At this time, it was about noon and they started preparing to induce me. After 6 separate and very painful attempts to give me an iv (and I have great veins!), the technician (who was very sweet but not exactly reassuringly competent) called in the anesthesiologist who slid it right in on the first try with virtually no pain (so now I have these attractive black and blue marks all over my hands and arms which make me look like a junkie ;) Once they got the iv hooked up, they started my Pitocin drip (so, no, I don't think I will ever get to experience a natural labor -- Caitlyn was also induced, but that was because she wouldn't come out on her own!) and I settled back for what we all figured would be a long and painful labor (based on the fact that I was only 1cm and my body was showing no natural signs of labor at all, plus Caitlyn was a long, difficult labor). Tim set off to take Caitlyn to the sitter, get the house in order, and pick up some things for me. I tried to call my mom, but the time difference meant it was the middle of the night in the States, so I wasn't able to get her on the phone. With Tim taking care of all our errands, I was all alone hooked up to the machines. Although the nurses and technicians couldn't have been nicer (I can't say enough wonderful things about them, it was a totally opposite experience from when I had Caitlyn), I felt very alone and very scared. At that point, all we knew is that Joceyn was very small and there was a high risk that her lungs weren't developed enough to breathe on her own, so I was very scared for her. I was also hooked up to an oxygen machine so that the flow to her would improve. I have really enjoyed my time in Japan, but if this experience teaches me nothing else, it is that I want to be home in the US so I can be near my family. I have never felt more alone and afraid then I did during that time when Tim was gone taking care of Caitlyn.

After what seemed like forever (but was probably only an hour or so), Tim came back just in time for the contractions to start coming harder. They were still about 3-4 min apart, but the Pitocin makes even early labor no picnic. Dr Mills came and checked on me and wasn't happy that my cevix wasn't progressing along with my contractions, so she inserted this extremely uncomfortable balloon thingie which is supposed to help um...open you up a little bit. As you progress, the balloon gradually gets pushed out so you know when you reach about 3-4 cm dialated. A few hours later, my contractions were getting really unbearable, but the stupid balloon thing hadn't budged. I was getting really discouraged and worried because I felt like such a wuss for not being able to handle the pain without there being any real progress, plus there was the risk of having to get a c-section if the labor went on too long with no progress (I have always been deathly afraid to get a c-section). Finally, I just couldn't take it anymore and asked the nurse to call in the anesthesiologist to get my epidural. Dr Mills came in to check me one more time before they put the epidural in and, low and behold, I was already at 5-6cm, the balloon simply hadn't fallen out. I was so happy when I heard that because it made me feel a lot better about the whole dealing with the pain thing (my contractions were reducing me to tears at this point, they were coming every 2-3min and lasting at least 1min each, so I wasn't getting much relief). Just like when I had Caitlyn, ignorance is your best friend when it comes to things like epidurals. I didn't look at any of the equipment and just concentrated on facing Tim and pretending none of this was happening to me (which is difficult to do when your contractions won't stop). Luckily, the process seemed much easier this time around, partially, I think, due to technilogical advances and partially due to a much better staff, and soon I wasn't feeling much more than the pressure and almost no pain at all. Yay epidurals! :)

After that, there wasn't much more to do other than wait. I wish I could say I rested easier, but right about the time I got the epidural, Jocelyn's heartrate started to drop significantly with the crescendo of each contraction. Luckily, I was the only one in labor and delivery at the time, so the nurses were extremely attentive and monitored me very closely to keep and eye on her progress. Again I was worried about getting a c-section because if her heartrate continued to drop too low, they would have to do and emergency c-section to get her out. So, I spent the entire time listening to the beeping of her heartrate on the machine and freaking out every time it dropped. At about 9pm, Dr Mills checked on me again and pronounced me at 7cm (10cm is fully dialated meaning that birth is imminent, so 7cm meant I probably had only a few hours to go). That made me really happy because Caitlyn's labor was so long that the epidural wore off long before she actually came out, so I had no pain relief at all for the last 6 hours of labor and pushing, which really sucked. I tried calling my mom again and finally got a hold of her to tell her the news. After I hung up with her, I started to get these weird sensations, like a strong pressure in my pelvis. As I said before, with Caitlyn, I had no medication when it came time to push, and there is no feeling in the world like the urge to push when that baby is ready to come out. With the epidural, you literally feel almost nothing, so I had no idea that my body was psuhing, I just knew that I felt really weird. So I told the nurse that I thought something was wrong. It was only about 9:15-9:20, so Dr Mills had literally just checked me, but she decided to check just in case. As soon as she reached down, she started to freak out a little bit. Turns out I was already to 10cm and she could feel the baby's head. She immediately dashed out the room to find Dr Mills and I could hear all the commotion out in the hallway and over the loudspeaker as they tried to page her. Tim and I really start to freak out at this point since I have absolutely no control over what my body is doing (so I can't stop pushing) and no one knows where the doctor is. The nurse comes running back in and just at that moment I feel a really weird sensation, so I tell her that something is really wrong. She pulls back the sheet to check me again and there is Jocelyn lying on the bed. (Poor Tim...I'm so glad the sheet was over me because I can only imagine what he would have done if he had seen Jocelyn come out like that with no one there but the two of us!) I didn't know this at the time because I was lying on my back and couldn't see anything, but Jocelyn came out with the cord wrapped around her neck and she wasn't making any noise or moving, so Tim got really scared. The nurse yelled for him to go find someone (anyone, since she was the only one in the room besides us at that point), so he goes running for the door. Just as he pulls it open to yell for help, the doctor and all the rest of the staff coming running into the room. Dr Mills scoops Jocelyn up and cuts the cord. Immediately she starts crying and wriggling around. They put her over on the little warming table and quickly announce her Apgar at about an 8-9, which means she was exhibiting all the signs of a perfectly healthy baby. After all the drama and the fear, Jocelyn turned out to be in perfect health with no outward signs of any problems other than being a bit small. She even turned out to be a lot bigger than the ultrasound had guessed. Born at 9:28pm, she weighed in at a healthy 4lb 15oz and 18 inches long.

After establishing that Jocelyn was okay and wouldn't need to be hooked up to a ventilator after all, the doctor turned her attention back to me. Turns out I hadn't ripped or teared at all. In fact, physically, Jocelyn's birth was rather easy on my body (not to say that it wasn't painful and I'm definately still recovering. I just think that after having such a traumatic experience with Caitlyn, who was literally twice Jocelyn's size, my body had no problem pushing Jocelyn right out with ease). Dr Mills didn't have to do much other than deliver the placenta and double check that everything was alright down there before going back to the baby.

After about 1-2 hours of cleaning, weighing, and checking her out, Jocelyn was pronounced to be in perfect health. She was handed over to me for her first feeding, and she latched on like a champ. This kid has no problems in the feeding department. If anything, she eats more than Caitlyn did! I can't describe just how tiny and delicate she is. After having such a strong and robust baby like Caitlyn, I was unprepared for such a tiny bundle. I actually have to go out and buy some preemie clothes (even though, technically, she was born full-term) because she is way to small for newborn sizes. She has almost no fat on her little body (although she's working hard to fix that by eating like crazy), but she has a perfect, round little head and looks like a little angel (not that I'm biased!). We are so happy that she is finally here and that everything turned out okay. I feel so incredibly lucky an blessed that everything turned out the way it did because it could have easily been a much different story.

So, that is our story. We stayed 2 days in the hospital so they could keep an eye on her, but everything seems to be just fine. Jocelyn does still have some jaundice, but her pediatrician assures me this is normal in smaller babies and the levels are not high enough to really worry about that this point. We are having to keep her on a light strip which gives her body some kind of uv rays that helps her red blood cells work properly and bring her into the hospital daily to get checked. Hopefully Monday will be that last day for that. Other than that, she is thriving just beautifully, and we are adjusting to her small size (it is very hard because we always worry that we are going to hurt her since she is sooo small). I am in the process of downloading our next set of pictures, so I'll post them when they are ready. Love to all!